Creating a Reset
One simple trick to create a reset in your life.
I have unfortunately had many nights where I spent my time worrying or creating lists in my head of things that I needed to get done. I reflect on times when I was so stressed that all I would do is go back through my day and think about everything that happened and everything that could have gone different and started the endless replay of how I didn’t handle something or things that were left off the list at the end of the day. I hated this. I would try to use television as a way to get my brain to turn-off but even if I got myself to fall asleep I would inevitably wake-up at some point during the night and then it would start….all over again. Does this sound familiar to you?
Today, I sleep like a baby. I don’t use the television to go to sleep. Most nights I drift off pleasantly or while listing to something positive with a sleep timer (bedtime story etc.). What changed?
Why don’t I create the lists anymore? Why am I not worried anymore?
Funny thing is, I could have plenty of things I am sure I could worry about. The difference is now I have the belief that I can and will get anything accomplished that I need to AND that things happen for me not to me, easily.
Would you like to go to sleep with ease and stop beating yourself up about various things that did or didn’t happen during the day?
Today is a very special day. You are here, reading this, and saying to yourself, yes, I would like to do things differently. You can.
I used three techniques that stopped this cycle for me. First, you have to realize that what this is, is a pattern or cycle. That is it. It isn’t something fundamentally wrong with you. It is just our very old reptilian brain that likes to have this patterned behavior - and you can train yourself to stop and have a different pattern. Second, you need to truly have a desire to want to create a different pattern. If it feels really comfortable for you to continue this behavior because you know there is a consistent outcome - then you may have difficulty. Third, you need to take some time to hear what the underlying causes or worries are. What are the repetitive words you use to describe the things that have happened? - We will talk more about this below.
Document the Cycle
What happens in what order and what is it that wakes you up or causes you to not get to sleep? What is the pattern of how you get into bed, what you do before, and what happens once you are there? What are the things your mind brings up? What are the things your mind says to you? Think about where this pattern may have come from in your past.
It is important for you to understand this first as your order of action may be different depending on what comes up.
For me, one of the major repetitive things was concerns over money. Even when I didn’t need to be concerned about money, I was concerned about money. In my childhood, my parents had a family-owned business. Money was either coming in or it wasn’t. We either had a full refrigerator or we didn’t. This caused me to have a weird relationship with money and mail. I avoided what might be in the mail - as usually, it would be bills (I would think) and in my upbringing the mail either brought checks for the business or it didn’t and sometimes my mom would cry. This pattern almost started to be recreated in my adult life and had impacts on other areas - like my constant need for a full refrigerator, more than the food I really needed etc. etc.
I tell you all of this so that you can see how these things can build into these bigger patterns of things that keep ourselves up at night worrying about - but they may not be the reality of our situation.
The Realization that the Words I use are Important
This was a big one. If something happened at work, perhaps a conversation with a co-worker or a customer and I didn’t like the outcome or there was conflict, I would replay it over and over again. The words I would tell myself about those situations matter. The language you use and what you say out loud also matter. I had to re-write what I was saying to be positive and almost come up with various different matra’s to help rewire what my pattern naturally was. For instance, with the money example, I rewrote that as money always finds its way to me. The universe always has my back and brings me what I need when I need it. There hasn’t been a time where I didn’t get what I needed. This is a lot more powerful than, What if I can’t make enough money, What if etc. etc.
The benefit is this actually started to change the patter of what was physically happening in my life. And, things did arrive when I needed them, and that has caused me to believe even more that it does.
NLP and Hypnosis
To seal all of this in, greater than mantra’s I used both hypnosis and NLP. With NLP I used a technique in which you take each of the old patterns or sayings, give yourself the opposite and then you perform a ritual in which you rewire the new saying in your mind - with both physical activity and repetitive mantra’s. This helps you make the old thought or saying seem ridiculous and funny and basically stops you from recurring. If you are interested in the specific technique, DM me and we can set-up a free 30-minute call and I will tell you how to do it. Be aware, it is silly and will make you laugh.
For hypnosis, I used recorded messages set to music that rewired my thoughts about money, for instance. I did this for 60 days as I went to sleep - and it really made a significant difference. While your issue may not be about money, it may be something else, you can still use this technique for whatever it is that you want to change.
I hope this post has made you feel empowered and in control of your destiny. You don’t have to spend sleepless nights worrying about those things - you have the control, you got this.
Reach out if you need help. I am always available for a three 30 minute consultation to get you started on the right path.
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